Tall Poppy Diaries

Observations and musings on life as a happy high-achiever (or what the Aussie's call a "Tall Poppy" ). "Unless you choose to do great things with it, it makes no difference how much you are rewarded, or how much power you have." --Oprah Winfrey

Wednesday, August 11, 2004

 

  Is It Ever "OK" To Complain?

How bad does your life have to be in order to earn the right to complain?

Is it selfish to have all the trappings of success and happiness and STILL think that one day out of your life is the pits?

And if you complain about that ONE day, do you then lose the right to ever complain again?

I have always been a glass half-full kind of girl. I am the person everybody can unload their problems and concerns to, knowing that I will be appropriately sympathetic and offer them upbeat (and sometimes helpful) advice.

It's a rare and shortlived moment when I complain--generally choosing, instead, to focus on the light at the end of the tunnel...even if the light is barely visible in the distance. However, yesterday I just happened to be sitting at my computer working against several deadlines when yet another "job"--my least favorite of all--got dumped in my lap.

In a cathartic and uncharacteristically candid moment, I decided to write about my distaste for the job at hand in my blog. Not only did I feel that it was what any other self-respecting blogger would have done; but it drives me crazy that some people seem to think that my life is perfect. NOBODY'S life is perfect and a lot of the envy that Weeds feel toward Tall Poppies is because they feel that Tall Poppies have it so easy while their lives are the pits!

Two of my friends have contacted me about my post. The first thought I sounded like a whiney _____ and said that if she weren't already my friend, she would never want to know me after reading that post. The other thought that it was funny, disarming and said that she thinks that we would all live more harmoniously if more Tall Poppies were that honest about their lives...others wouldn't feel so angry about your success if they knew that success wasn't a cure-all.

So which is it? Should Tall Poppies keep their private worlds private and keep up the facade of perfection? Or should they let their guard down occasionally and reveal their humanity in all it's unguarded glory?

Everybody has days where they think their particular situation is rotten. YES, there are millions of people in situations MUCH worse than mine. YES, there are starving children all over the world. YES, I am lucky, as one of my friends reminded me, " to have a roof over your head". YES, YES, I have NEVER said that I am not extremely blessed to be me. I don't know many people who go through life in a happier emotional state than me, and I KNOW that even THAT is a blessing!

And, yet, is it my curse to always HAVE to be happy? Do I not ever have a right to complain? Do I sell myself short when I admit that I am unhappy about something others might think is trivial? My friends have always described me as "What you see is what you get" and "the most optimistic person they know". I have proudly worn both labels. In college, a friend gave me a Ziggy card that read something like:

"Some complain that roses have thorns; you always seem happy that thorns have roses".

Corny, and true. However, just because I can celebrate the roses at the ends of my thorns, should I be precluded from complaining on those rare occasions when I get pricked?

What do YOU think?

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